Tuesday, January 14, 2014

We're Breaking Up

After a 15 year relationship of ups and downs plus plenty of sweat, blood, and tears, we're finally putting a stop to the madness. This wasn't an easy decision. I put in lots of long hours in trying to make it work, but it's time to face the facts, I just can't do it anymore.

So, it's official.

I'm breaking up with running.

This truly is a case of "it's not you it's me." Running didn't do anything wrong exactly. The problems started with how I view running. For you to really understand this decision we've got to back up a bit.
This is from a triathlon a did a few years back

Growing up I was a swimmer. It pretty much took up all of my free time. I was in the pool 6 days a week for 2 to 2 and half hours usually with an extra hour added on for dry land {weights, running, etc} a day. In the summer and even towards the end of my swimming "career" we did two-a-days. Weekends consisted not of parties and hanging out with friends, but traveling to swim meets or extra hard practices. Are you getting the picture that it was my life?

I loved competing and loved being in the pool, but I've just now started to realize how much it influenced how I think about exercise. Even after I quit swimming, going to work out 30 minutes or even a hour a day 3 times a week wasn't enough. In my mind, it had to be 2+ hours everyday or it was none at all. I would get obsessed with working out and then when I couldn't maintain that routine because life got in the way I would quit all together.  When I would try to get back into a working out I would get so overwhelmed and frustrated with my body not being use to handling that kind of stress that I would quit again. It became a vicious cycle. *I am in no way blaming swimming or competitive sports for my way of thinking. I know that I'm naturally prone to that "all or nothing, black and white" thinking,*

Recently I was on a walk, where I was judging myself for walking and not running, when I began to think about the unhealthiness and craziness in how I think about exercise. Then, on July 4th a friend and I were running and we started talking about we really didn't enjoy running at all. It hurts my knees and it gets kinda boring. I got to thinking "if I'm not having fun why the heck am I doing this?!" It had never really occurred to me before that I didn't have to do this.

And so, that's how I decided that I'm breaking up with running.

Obviously, running isn't the problem. The problem is in how I think about exercise. Running just happens to be the one exercise I always thought I had to do.

I'm not saying I'll never run again, but from now on I'll run because I want to and not because I have to.

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  1. I was a swimmer, too! And I get what you were thinking re:time at the gym. I cannot make myself get back in the water because I'll swim a mile in 30 minutes and think about getting out, and remember that back in college, I would have done a mile and a half in that time and it would've just been warm up!
    I'm trying to run now just because I was a distance swimmer and I'm fairly decent at putting my body on auto pilot and tuning out my mind while I exercise. What are you trying to pick up instead of running?

    1. We fellow swimmers have got to stick together! I completely understand not being able to get back in the water. It's really depressing doing an entire workout that you would have done a few years ago as just a warm up. Running is very similar to swimming in the "don't think just do it" sense. Now I enjoy Bar Method, walking, and weight training. I really like group classes where someone else is motivating me :)

  2. Good for you! I made this decision in college (I know a little early), but I just got to the point where it wasn't even fun and it it was making an issue I have with my foot a million times worse no matter what I tried. I'll still go for a run every now and then, but only when it's for fun or a good cause!

  3. AMEN! haha. I took my daughter on a walk yesterday and thought, ya know...there's really nothing wrong with walking - why do I feel the need to have to run?

  4. Sometimes I ask myself the same thing! I've started to realize I can't run like I used to due to some hip issues I've had for years and every time I overrun what my body can handle, I beat myself up and turn against running. Truth is, we don't have to :) Good for you! Enjoy your time away from running!

  5. Girl, you KNOW that as a swammer, I completely feel you on this. I have the worst relationship with exercise, and I know it's because I did two a days from age 13 through college. It's the same reason I have such body issues. I think we almost need to re-train our minds about moderation, you know? I fully support your decision :)

  6. Good for you girl! Do things because you love them...not because you HAVE to! Happy Wednesday!

    P.S. I nominated you for the Liebster Award! All the details are on my blog! (it's really fun!)

  7. Don't you love when you realize that , "hey! I'm an adult! And I don't have to do this if I don't want!" :) Oh the pressure we put on ourselves!

  8. Power walking= my routine. I always admired runners but I could never stick to it. It tired me out so easily! Let me know if you need ice cream or anything sent to you to get over the break-up ;) ;)

  9. I'm right there with you, girl! I tried running for a while and just couldn't stick to it (hurt knees, boring...just like you said). And I can easily get obsessed with a routine, so I totally feel you! Good for you for saying "no" to that relationship, especially if it's not making you happy! xo

  10. I couldn't have said it better myself, friend! I'm so glad we had that epiphany together :) I love you and your encouraging words!!


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