Thursday, October 3, 2013

Little Green Monsters

A sweet facebook friend of mine posted the other day about feeling "left behind" because friends were getting engaged. 

I got to thinking about my own "left behind" feelings which often leads to comparison and jealousy who are lurking around the corner. Before I met James it was jealousy of friends getting engaged. 
Then it was marriage. Now its babies and buying houses. 
While I was and continue to be happy for my friends I can't help but notice that I start to compare my life to theirs. 
I know a girl who was married, bought a beautiful house, and had a baby all in her first year of marriage. That is never something I wanted, but now I find myself wondering... am I doing this wrong? Maybe I want a house and a baby or two!

Pump the brakes a second... I don't even want a kid right now! 
But I forget that in the midst of my wanting what those around me have. Jealously slowly creeps in and I forget about our lives and what James and I hope for our family. 

Why is that? 
Why is it so easy want to live like someone else? 
Why is it so easy to forget who I live for and remember my plan doesn't even matter?

Where does one even start with contentment and peace in where you are? 
For me, probably with the above mentioned question. Living in the words that remind me there is a plan for my life that is so much greater than I could ever understand.

And, maybe remembering to just breathe and just be. 

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